Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Avatar Hero


In what will come as a surprise to absolutely no one, annoying hack James Cameron's next film, Avatar, has been delayed six months with a scheduled release in December of 2009.  The main reason this isn't surprising of course is that he's making a movie that happens in space, which as we all know, I invented.  
So of course it's going to take him some extra time to work out the intellectual property rights with my minions over at Lucas Licensing.  Additionally, it's just harder to tell stories in space when you're not a super-genius like me.
Jar Jar dropped by WETA the other day to see how work's coming, and he told me the funniest stories.  Apparently, they think they're as good as ILM.  The boys are working on an anti-Kiwi death ray as we speak.

P.S.  Why is James Cameron trying to look like my good friend (and underling) Steve Jobs?  Everybody knows the cool kids wear flannel, black turtlenecks are for weenies (sorry Steve, you know it's true.)

Monday, December 10, 2007

The Prettiest of All

I think that of all the fishes in the sea, my favorite is the sturgeon. If I could make a puppet of one that had Jar Jar's voice, I would marry it.